Without anchor?

Saturday, October 06, 2007



Some days that appear the most normal, are the ones that make me feel most at sea. Watching Brennan play soccer, seeing families cheer together, makes me more lonely than I care to admit. I wonder how I could have gotten my life back together and still feel adrift. I can't help but wonder which of my choices was the final straw that tipped me to the point of no return....The place where I will never have a family again. Life is good, my job is good. Brennan is fantastic, I bought a new car...been sober for a year now. and yet I am utterly lonely. I feel like I am a ship without anchor, I see land but can find no safe harbor to call mine. I wonder if I will ever be around families and not feel a sense of loss. I know its my choices but I don't know how to fix it. so yeah. That's me lately